Ford tells schools to start selling beer for funding if Beer Store against Corner Store sellers

Doug Ford promoting on the job drinking, the way his brother Rob loved to be on the job

Doug Ford has reportedly told Ontario Educators that they should start selling beer if they need more funding, especially if he's going to be breaching the province's contract with authorized alcohol sellers like the Beer Store that limits the number and types of sellers in Ontario. That contract would result in several hundred million dollars having to be paid out by the province if Doug Ford's dream of beer being available at corner stores came to reality before 2025, and so Doug has reportedly been telling people, including education officials, that since he's going to be adding these violations to his long list of ongoing violations and crimes, schools might as well get in on it and start selling beer as well so that they can get the funding they need themselves and stop protesting him.
Doug has been facing regular protests from parents, grandparents, educators, students and children over his planned cuts to Ontario education to help his corporate donors have dumber and easier to manipulate clients, as well as easier to fool voters. Doug Ford himself dropped out of college 2 months in before criminal charges could be brought against him for several violations, and many are saying his proposed cuts are some misguided revenge against the many teachers who refused to let him just pass when given money. Doug has reportedly said in the past that he wanted teachers to be so poor they couldn't afford to turn away bribes so that more students like him could have an easier time in school.
It is his hope that they will also be so poor they can't afford to not sell alcohol on school property. Doug is reportedly already of the opinion that a lot of teachers are drunks, so the schools would come with a built-in clientele, and with the students getting worse education, Doug is hopefully some of them will see merit in following in his late brother Rob's footsteps and become teenage alcoholics, which would further increase "Beer Schools" client base, and that students would be able to buy beer and bring it home so their parents don't even have to leave the house to get drunk. Doug is hopeful that, coupled with his rollback on sexual education, it will result in a feedback loop of drunk teenage parents spending all their money on alcohol and into the pockets of cheap, weak, American beer producers, just like his brother envisioned.
If you're looking forward to picking up your kids and beer at the same time, let us know! There's no better time for drunk text than in internet comments.