Doug Ford showing off his much ridiculed and full of spelling errors TTC plan in 2014
In a surprising move, Doug Ford crashed a city council debate about his proposal for the province to take over the TTC. Doug's proposal has been widely criticized by everyone, from people who don't think municipal transit should be managed by provincial politicians and if Ford is successful in taking the TTC he'll have to take all the other transit authorities in Ontario, to Ford supporters who want Doug to move on from his failed bid to be Toronto's mayor back in 2014.
"It's really childish," said Shelley Tapp, the Ontario deputy minister of transportation, who was literally dragged to the debate by Doug. "He really can't let the fact that he lost go, it's one of the most pathetic things I've ever seen, and it's pulling resources from dealing with more important issue that affect all Ontarians, like taxes on the rich. Plus it means I keep having to work with that despicable Ford crony Michael Lindsay [Doug's special adviser to himself on making sure they acquire the TTC], ugh. I can't wait for the Conservatives to get rid of him for wasting so much time like this."
Doug spoke at length about why he wanted things to go the way he wanted, although gave little detail as to what he actually wanted to do with the TTC. "You know I want to keep these kinds meetings behind closed doors and not where reporters can report on them because I don't want those damn Torontonians who wouldn't recognize a good mayor if he sold drugs right in front of them to get all 'You can't hire unqualified people just because they're your friend' and 'oh you can't just spend some of the money on kickbacks for friends who are black mailing you with video of you selling drugs which is what got your dumb ass brother into so much shit', all that damn political correct junk. I'm the premier, don't I get to decide what's correct in politics now?"
"I want to put my own mark on the TTC, so people will forever remember me when they use the TTC, and I also want to use it to give some, uh, qualified people I am familiar with, like Michael Lindsay. Michael, Michael come here," Doug said as he pulled Michael up to the podium as Michael had tried to leave the room. "I gave him this job to help me take over the TTC, and once we take it over, I'm going to have him in charge of the day to day stuff at the TTC, and I know lots of other qualified people I can have work at my depart of TTC management. Since it's not a legal position, I won't have people protesting any appointments this time. So remember, the people I know are absolutely qualified for their positions and are by no means compromised by knowing me in anyway. I'm sure anybody who know my family and our history can say there isn't a thing that's compromising about us." Michael at that point used the opportunity as Doug distracted himself with family memories to slip away and avoid further time in the spotlight.
Doug proceeded to ramble on for several more minutes about how excited he was to "look at alternative delivery methods for human beings", the "different possible technologies we can overcharge to install", and how Toronto needed a "truly unique transit system like no city has ever seen", before being whisked away by his security without clarifying any details of his plans or answering any questions. The city council proceeded to finally return to their debate, with many agreeing that this was no doubt an example of what having Doug involved in the process would be like.
The debate wasn't settled at the time of this writing, as Doug's interruption delayed the city council's schedule, but we'll let our readers know when we learn more. Stay tuned and refresh your page every hour to see if we post more!
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